My testimony of how I came to Jesus Christ
This started as a letter I originally planned to write to some of my friends – some of whom believe, some do not, (ACTS 28:24-27) and some who may not fully understand.
It's a testimony of how I came to truly know God – my Lord, my Savior:
JESUS CHRIST.
I felt compelled one day, to write this testimony, to share with others some of the amazing things that have been happening; not just in my life, but in the Church.
I write this not out of any vanity, nor for my own glory, for only God alone is worthy of the glory and all praise.
This profits me nothing, but it is my sincerest prayer, that it will profit you everything.
I hope you will find this as rewarding, as the experiences recorded within, have been to me.
The year was 1970, when my Creator brought me forth into this world. I was born in “St. Francis” hospital. Shortly thereafter, under the roof of a Catholic church, I was christened and baptized as a baby. I had not known then, but I had been surrounded from my very first moments, by the things of God.
As I grew from an infant into a child, I went with my family to St. Ignatius, a Catholic church located in Yardley, Pennsylvania.
The only gospel I had known, was that which was spoken to me in our church. I remember crossing myself in the name of Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, but I never really had a grasp of what it all meant.
As a child, I enjoyed and loved the sermons. I had not read the Bible, except for those times in the church. So, I was not really aware of much of what was in the Old or New Testament, other than what the priest had read aloud to everyone in church.
As kids, we watched a lot of TV in those days, so much of our Bible learning was through that of movies such as; the Ten Commandments, and the Story of Jesus, His birth, death and resurrection.
I had gone to Sunday school, received my “First Communion”, and went to “active confession”, but I don't remember anyone ever telling me to actually read the Bible. Maybe I did not hear that in the sermons at the time. I don't know.
I do know that as I grew older, and time went on, our family went less on Sundays. Eventually, we all decided to spend more time as a family together.
I did not know at the time, but I think that began my decent away from the Lord.
Decent away from the Lord
I tried my best to be a good person. I had a very guilty conscious, and had difficulty being dishonest. I didn't think I had an ego or much of one. If a kid punched me I would think, “Should I turn the other cheek?” I was often the target of abuse from other kids on the playground, gym class, and hallways of my pre-high school years.
Though now in my teens, I was now in a rebellious phase – not against my family, but against society in general and its ills and sadly, even God. I struggled as young teen, trying find confidence in myself and find a purpose. I went off into the punk scene began to become politically interested in the world around me.
The punk music and its very violent political charged lyrics had helped shape my political nature and my mind. It definitely shaped my view of the world and religions. I painted all religions with a broad stroke.
I can remember at times, even defying Him, questioning God in my bed asking things as I lay awake at night asking, “Why do you allow such suffering?” I didn't know.
The various TV Evangelist Scandals of 80s I think may have played a role in being disgusted with Christian ideas or doctrine. Words like the “Bible” scared me, for I associated it with ultra conservatives and right wing racists. (Was I ever wrong.)
During the years that followed my decent, I searched for answers in all the wrong places. As a result, I grew further away from the Lord.
Looking back, I now can see I did much sin. I had sinful thoughts, sinful eyes, a sinful tongue. I was yet another product of man’s sinful world -a world of the flesh, man (the flesh) makes for himself.
A detour
I will now skip ahead in time, it was the year 1989. I had graduated from High School and gone away to college in Brooklyn, New York. I also wanted to save the world back then. My life was about to take detour.
Through the punk music and events on the TV, I became fascinated by the human rights struggle taking place in the north of Ireland which was under British rule. So, one day I called up an Irish organization, which I had some literature they had mailed me, and traveled in the subway a long trip to visit this Irish political organization.
On that morning, I met three people in that dusty disorganized office. One of them that day, was later, 10 years later my girlfriend (and one day my wife).
I was a shy young man at 19, and had not a clue how to introduce one’s self to a pretty girl. I saw her not more than a few times after that and we’d met only once or twice at an outside political demonstration, exchanging a word or two. I remember going back the next week to that office, where I would return to and make many long lasting friendships and learn a new politics over time, but she was nowhere to be found. She had left the area, but I never forgot her. Her memory stayed with me throughout.
I spent the next ten years in the Irish Republican cause and became a political activist opposing British rule.
Ten years later in the year 2000, the Irish “conflict” it seemed, was getting more corrupt, more violent, and more hopeless.
I had by that time, my own outrageous outspoken Irish Republican website.
Then one day, I received an e-mail from a person who was interested in my site. It was the girl I had met 10 years ago! She had e-mailed my website! She was living in California. I had left school after 3 years and had moved back home, now in New Jersey.
After the initial e-mail, we exchanged phone calls, e-mails and photos. After a period of time, it became clear that we began to feel something strong for each other. We felt we were “lost soul mates”. We both arranged to meet and finally we met in New York.
I’ll never forget the first time I saw her walk down the airport hallway and into my life again. I was so happy. We had the most amazing time together in that first meeting in New York City, learning so much more about each other.
Following her departure on the plane several days later, I was so determined to start a new life together.
I realized my life was a mess. I had not a lot of savings certainly not much to offer her and needed to get a new job. I needed to really begin to prepare for building a new life with her.
I had not found God but, little did I know, my girlfriend had a strong walk with God – and for a long time as well. Despite this fact, God wasn't actually brought up in our conversations for more than a year later, yet my life was beginning to change.
A true blessing
I believed in a God, but to me, he was a universal power who had no name but “God”. I knew something was responsible for everything around me, but I just didn’t know what.
Before I'd ever met her, I would pray at night to God, that one day I would meet someone special and amazing.. I now know He was listening, because she was everything I’d asked God for in my prayers.
Still, I had not known God.
Though I had not found God, in the true sense, meeting my girlfriend was a true blessing upon me and my life was about to change.
After she flew back home, I decided I needed a better job. My only ability was in Art. I started at a young age scribbling, then drawing, later painting, and much later computer graphics, but I had very little confidence in my ability as a graphic arts person. Being largely self-taught, except for a few courses, I was afraid to send out a resume. I just didn't think I had the skills required.
My girlfriend inspired me. She gave me so much confidence that, the next weekend, I faxed out my resume.
To my surprise, the next day, I had a few replies. One was from a New York based temp agency that I had mistakenly sent my resume to.
The voice on the phone said he had a company in New York looking for a person with my skills set, and would I be interested. I said, "Um...sure!" he said, "Ok, great. I'll call them back see if they can schedule you an appointment". A few minutes later I was called back and told to bring my portfolio and appear next Tuesday.
I was very nervous that morning, with my portfolio in hand. I also carried with me a photo of my girlfriend and myself taken on her first visit to New York. I stopped and checked the address of the tall building, looked at the photo and I thought in my head, “Oh God...I really need to get a good Job...so I can get out to where she is”.
I walked into my first serious interview still being unsure, nervous, scared out of my wits. I walked out, in disbelief walking four blocks in shock, because the interview went so well.
Soon, I had a new job with a much increased salary, and what would become the greatest work experience of my life - as far as my long list of awful job experiences.
I remember calling my girlfriend on the phone telling her in excited voice, “I got the job! I'm coming out!"
The Lord had heard and answered both our prayers, yet I had not known God.
A long test
Though we’d celebrated and looked so eagerly to the future, our Love was about to undergo a long test.
I expected only to work as long as it took to get just enough money to move, but after speaking with my dad and my friends, and my own guilty conscience of feeling a loyalty to this great company, I ended up working a bit longer - two years. I had no idea I'd be working in New York as long as I did, and so, we had long distance relationship - with lots of visits back and forth.
The distance, expensive phone bills and trips to and from, made it difficult to save up money the first year. The distance was not easy, but we did it. We missed one another greatly. We had our ups and downs, but during the tough times, my prayers to God were again answered.
Still, I had not learned of my God, and I had much to learn.
Shaken
A year later in September of 2001, we had arranged to celebrate our Birthdays together. As the Lord would plan it, both of ours were in September. Who would have guessed what would happen on the 11th day, as two hi-jacked airplanes hit the side of the World Trade Center and my stable world was now “shaken” – as was everyone else's. (HAGGAI 2:6-7)
I was then, commuting everyday into New York City by train. That day was very terrifying for me, more so, as I had not been able to contact my girlfriend until later in the day, which made it worse.
I can still remember calling from a fellow co-worker’s apartment – being trapped somewhere in Brooklyn and crying on the phone to my girlfriend wondering if I’d ever see her again. Later that night praying to God if I’d make it out there alive to be with her.
I took those days and events that followed September 11th very rough. I was often afraid for my pathetic self as for others. I was, as were many others, afraid of more terrorist attacks going off in buildings, and afraid of anthrax or chemical agents.
My girlfriend was a rock of support for me throughout it all. Though, now I look back, I was very selfish the way I had acted and thought.
God provides a way
My girlfriend by now, had spoken more about her faith to me. She was hoping privately, that one day I'd be open to God as she was, but she never really pushed me, or pushed the Bible on me.
She told me several times to put my faith in God. Leave my life in His hands and whatever happens, just happens. I tried, but it didn't register to me at the time. But, God was about to provide a way.
For she had a larger walk with God. From her youth, she along with her sister, was raised in a Protestant faith. Later she was baptized in Jesus's name in a river in Indiana. She grew up loving the Bible and Bible studies.
Truthfully, I really wasn't all that interested, nor in any hurry to get back to know God. After all, I had went through a lot of rebellion against religion Now, I understand that rebellion was a great sin, but more importantly, I now understand that God’s love and mercy is never ending, because He was in a hurry to get to know me.
God had heard my prayers again. I flew safely out to my girlfriend for our birthdays.
As my present, she had bought me 4 computer books. She also picked out and bought me a New King James Bible. It was my first Bible. She signed the inside cover dedicated it to me.
I remember when the trip was over and I had reluctantly flown back to New York, I sent her an e-mail from my work, thanking her for all books.
I wrote her saying, "Oh by the way, I'm now reading the Good Book". So, she was like "Ok, he’s probably reading the Computer Networking book" which I had spoken so much about out there.
I said, "No, the Good Book". It still hadn’t registered. I think it took her three more e-mails back and forth before she got it.
It was the only of all the books she had bought me that I had begun to actually read.
My walk back to God.
I was reading and yet I was only taking in "milk", as the Bible states.
By December 2002, I was finally moved out to California, and working for my company remotely – another prayer God had answered.
One day, my girlfriend asked me if I wanted to go to church with her on Sunday. I admit, at first, I was not that excited or eager to begin going to church. I decided to go, but I went mainly because I loved her, and I really wanted to share everything with her.
We went to a few churches, but she had not found one that really, sang to her. I was just enjoying being with her and began getting more used to the idea of going to a church.
The Bible study
My girlfriend had some friends from her work who were very much into the Bible, and whose walk was in God's ways. She'd met the entire family and talked with them through her work, and she’d tell me all about them.
One day, she called me from work and invited me to a Bible study hosted at their house. I admit, I was not overly thrilled, for I was still in the “milk stage", my work was busy, and I was just settling in after the move. So, I had not done much reading of my Bible.
I remember well that day, as my girlfriend called me from her work, and told me all about the study. At first, I was "luke warm" on the idea and while on the phone, I noticed that she seemed kind of disappointed. So, I later sent her an e-mail trying to explain what I felt. In that e-mail, I explained how I wasn’t looking to be rushed into anything, and well, I kind of gave her my own philosophy of what I thought Jesus meant in his teachings.
I later realized my HUGE error.
Say, what you may of this incident, but later that night I badly burned my right hand while attempting to turn back on the gas pilot lamp under the water tank which had gone out. I burned the entire top of my right hand. It stung for a night and a day. Miraculously, nothing else had been burned, despite the fact I was lying down on the floor close to the hole at the bottom where the fireball which exploded and jumped out at me. I was very lucky, for it had not burned my hair, nor scarred my face - only my right hand.
I thanked God for sparing me that night from what could have resulted in far worse. I still had not known God and the Bible was to me still, “just another book.”
I was now in a humbled stage, my hand healing, and I protested not to go to the study. I went with her that Friday and we met her Christian friends – who would soon become our new friends – friends in Jesus Christ.
I remember, before walking in, being apprehensive and nervous, but they were such nice and such lovely people.
The Bible study was entitled: “The Search for Truth”. The Study was a front-to-back study of the Bible. They were from a local Pentecostal church.
So, that evening, there we were; with a table full of chips, sandwiches, and soda, talking and laughing in fellowship. We prayed first, asking the Lord to bless the food and everyone at the table for the journey we were about to embark.
After the eating was over, we cleared the table and each with our Bibles in hand, we prayed and then began the study.
An opened heart
The study began with the reading of motto on the cover of visuals used for the study: "When you open your bible, open your heart."
As the study started, I tried just that.
I said to God silently, “Lord if this is real, then let’s go!”
Do you know what I found?
The most amazing things that I had read once, or heard on a Sunday mass (way back when) suddenly all began to make sense and to pull on me.
The book of Geneses with Adam, Eve, the serpent, God's creation of man – all suddenly was making a lot more sense than what I may have thought before or once had questioned.
I had opened my heart and mind, and now I was receiving no longer milk, but "meat". I was now filled with a new hunger for the Word and went back to my New King James Bible and started again and read even more.
Church
We went that following Sunday to their church. There, we witnessed a really wild service. It was amazing. A large choir with incredible music, there was intense prayer going on, with a lot of praise. Some people were jumping around, dancing, even running in the isles.
We also heard people kind of wailing next to us in what I later learned was called "speaking in tongues". That was very strange to me, yet I shrugged it off.
After my first Pentecostal service, I went “Ok.” Yet after my first Bible study, the way people had worshiped, praised, and ran and jumped cheerfully up and down in the church service, celebrating and worshipping on seventh day God blessed and sanctified (GENESIS 2:3), seemed to make perfect sense – much more sense than what I had ever done in my old church– sitting quietly in a pew.
We spoke about it afterwards, and decided we should go back again.
The church, was a part of a larger United Pentecostal Churches. It preached Oneness: the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are one. Its only foundation is the Word of God, out of the Bible. If it's not in the Bible, they don't follow it – because it's not the truth from God. They’re right.
I later learned the Pentecostal Church takes its name from the “Day of Pentecost” (the first day of the first ever church) which is recorded in the Bible in the book of Acts 2:36.
A definite change
I had no idea at the time, really, what "Pentecostal" meant, but all I knew is that I was having more revelations (understanding) coming to me about what I was reading in the Bible. I understood it, and it made more sense, the more I read. So, we returned to my friend’s church again and with a new hunger and had more Bible studies with our new friends.
Never in my life, would I have ever imagined, sitting around and talking about the Bible could be so much fun!
To explain how much fun we had, we'd be there some Fridays until 2 a.m. in a Bible study simply going off on tangents in the Bible.
I was now into more the 1/2 of the Old Testament.
One day, the following week, while reading the Bible, I broke down and began to cry. I stopped reading, for I realized that very moment, that I was by no means the good righteous person I thought all those years myself to be.
I had in fact, done great sin!
I realized that God is righteous, He and none else. For an hour or more, in my anguish and pain, I poured out of my heart with emotions and tears.
I felt so unworthy and feared for myself – for my soul. I began to really fear God, and I prayed for His mercy and forgiveness. I asked the Lord for His forgiveness of all my sins.
A day later, I was feeling a definite change in myself.
We were now meeting more Bible based people, friends of the Bible study group. Later we’d learn that people who had met us at church only once or twice, were asking about us and had been praying for us. It was amazing.
So the weeks just kind of flew by and we'd gone to church for about 4 weeks straight.
A mistake
One Sunday I was standing next to my girlfriend, as the preacher was speaking about what he felt was a call from God to preach to someone there. He was preaching about those with guilt or something inside that was preventing them from a full walk with God. That if you have "something that you feel is holding you back, preventing you from doing work for the church, because you're ashamed of yourself or something of your past or sins or feel unworthy, then come up to the alter and hand your burden over to Jesus."
I felt as if the sermon was actually being spoken to among others, myself, but I stood still and did not move. Instead I looked around.
My girlfriend suddenly moved from my side and began to walk down to the alter. So, I followed after her, for I thought I had heard the preacher say something like, “Everyone come up to the front of church at the alter”. So, by accident, I followed her up to the alter.
Once I had reached the alter, I realized there was maybe 35 people, including my girlfriend and myself. I was thinking to myself, “Oops, I made a mistake”.
I had made a mistake, but I really needed to be there.
I now know that the Lord had pulled me up to His alter that morning for a reason.
I had now come before God and started to pray aloud and ask for His forgiveness of my sins of my past. I asked that God would wash me, cleanse me in thy ways that I could do right in thy Eyes.
As I prayed, people in the church came up and put their hands on me in prayer. I soon felt such intense emotions begin to come out. I began to cry and tears streamed down my face. Then I heard the preacher say “..Raise your hands up to the Lord...” as the congregation, all together, began to call out aloud: "In The Name of Jesus! In the Name of Jesus!"
Suddenly... something began to change around me... I heard everything start to sound, for lack of a better description, “warped”. The voices sounded kind of like as if the church was under water, it was very weird, yet I felt something so amazing begin to happen...
A gentle coolness was slowly descending down upon me. First, I felt it on my fingers, then my hands, and then traveled down my arms. God touched me!
Then, in an instant, I felt my arms relax, my chest relax, my mind relaxed, my tears stopped, and I began to smile.
I had just experienced a “peace” – A REAL PEACE – I had never known before in my life!
I had just felt the touch of the PEACE of almighty God!
Something awesome
The next Sunday, March 10th, 2002 we had gone to the church late. It was about 10:30am, I think - maybe a bit after. The praying and praise had already started. Everyone was praising and I began to pray and praise aloud.
Before this, I had only known to pray in quiet, not praise aloud, so this was a new thing for me.
My girlfriend, whom was next to me, our new church friends were standing and praising on the other side. No one could have known what was about to happen next…
That morning was like any other Sunday, in that ten or more Ministers were already standing and praising at the front alter, but that was soon about to change.
Suddenly one of the Ministers standing on the far left end, a tall fairly sized black Minister, began to loudly shout in a loud and strange voice. He was extremely loud and "spoke in tongues" as the Bible says happens when one is filled with the Holy Ghost - the Spirit of God. (ACTS 2:4)
The entire congregation present, in an instant fell silent. After short pause, he began shout again. This time in English. As the Bible explains, he began to interpret or translate the tongues. (1 Corinthians 14:13)
I wish not to misquote the Lord our God, nor am I so worthy. The following statement happened so fast and took everyone by surprise, but from the best I can remember and others seemed to recollect, the message was something like:
"I AM HERE WITH YOU…
I LOVE TO HEAR MY NAME PRAISED! PRAISE HIM NOW! ..PRAISE HIM..!
Everyone suddenly bowed, prayed, and praised, while others cried and wailed loudly.
It was amazing! God had actually come down and had spoken in our church!
I watched through much of the rest of the service that morning, as this same Minster stood crying into his handkerchief, praising God through the entire service. So, once it calmed down a bit, the preacher used the time to praise and worship God, which we did.
The pastors’ assistant then said that he felt that with “the Spirit of God being so strong in the church, that He’s here because He wants to help somebody here today.” That anyone here that may feel as though they have “a mask they wear, they hide behind” because they are ashamed of something they had done that it was time to come up an offer that burden to Lord. “Let Him have your burden.”
Upon hearing this, I got up. I got out of my seat, and I went toward the alter, and I put my hands up to the Lord.
Soon, I had hands from others on me, joining me in prayer. Soon I began to hear the voice of someone calling my name.
It was not God, but someone in the church whom I would meet afterwards and was known for giving many people the Holy Ghost.
He was speaking into my ear as I was praising asking to be cleansed of my sins. The voice was saying, I was doing very well, and that I should just pray to Jesus, whatever I felt like saying. “Just let it come out.” So, I prayed and praised aloud. I was saying “Hallelujah” and over and over and I was very emotional and getting very weary. But then, I began feel this amazing energy as I held my hands in the air toward God – suddenly again I felt the very same PEACE fall on me, just as I had felt the week before – the same PEACE.
My friend said of me afterwards, I began to feel “heavy” as I was no longer standing on my own. I suddenly “fell limp.” One minute, I was standing on my feet, as people were essentially holding me–lifting me toward God–suddenly, I felt the presence of the Spirit and I felt calm inside and went limp like as a jelly fish – as though I had no bones in me.
Afterwards, I felt so exhausted. I was told I had received the Holy Ghost, but, I was not fully so sure if that was what I had received. I had indeed, felt something awesome, not knowing what I felt, but I knew that it had come from God.
I had received a touch of the Spirit, which I now had felt, and I now had heard.
It was much later, that I would realize I had not received the Holy Ghost that day. I sensed that might have been the case, for in my mind, I still had traces of doubt left as to what was happening.
Speaking in tongues and Holy Spirit was very new and still foreign to me. I had not read of it yet.
It taught me an important lesson we all must come to God in the truth.
Before we had arrived to the church that morning, it was damp and gloomy. It looked like rain or a thunderstorm was ready. After church, we walked outside in amazement to see not one storm cloud in the sky. It was a beautiful sunny blue-sky day.
That day, we all rejoiced and I went home and took a nap, because I was so exhausted.
Ready
I was asked, immediately following that first amazing incident, if I wanted to be baptized that very morning. I had declined, for I felt unsure of this. I felt this was pressure on me, and even with God speaking that morning, I wasn't sure of the timing. I was told to do it when you feel it’s right and in “God's time”. I was also extremely exhausted over the first morning.
I thought about baptism some, but not a great deal. But, when Monday morning came, and I arose out of bed, I felt so strongly that now I was ready to be Baptized in Jesus’s name - in the NAME of the Father, the Son and Holy Ghost – All of which are three Holy titles and the name of One – name of Jesus Christ thy LORD.
I owe my full understanding of this to my friends and another church member, a very nice young man from Korea who found God and is working toward his own ministry one day in Korea.
Now, I was ready. I looked so much to it the entire week. I wanted to be changed. I am a changed man now, but I wasn't rid of the sins which I had done before my Lord. I wanted to be Holy in His eyes, and ears, and walk in His ways, to follow Him.
That week, I prepared myself for what I was about to do. I read up on “Baptism” and all the verses in the Bible I could. Baptism is so important and so huge it’s all over the Bible.
Reading on baptism actually took me through a lot of the pages and books of the New Testament. Until now, I had read largely the Old Testament, because I chose to read the Bible from start to finish. ( I highly recommend) Now I was reading Matthew, Mark, John, Romans and Acts. I just read through the books.
That Friday night, we had our Bible study and it spoke about baptism more in depth, but by then, I felt I really had a strong grasp of it.
Handel's “Messiah”
Saturday came and went very fast. On weekends, my girlfriend usually went to the gym, and I would go and read the Bible while I’d wait for her in the book store at the mall. So, I read of the book of Job and then decided to look for a music cd. During the week I wanted to listen to Handel's "Messiah," which is an English opera written by George Frideric Handel about the birth, death, and resurrection of Christ.
I had heard Handel's "Messiah" before and it is such lovely music. My father used to play it on holidays at our home. I can remember walking across the college campus singing the opera or part of it in my head, without knowing all the words. I had no idea it was sung in English. So this was great because I could finally read along and understand all the lyrics.
I know you are likely asking what Handel opera has to do with my story. To me it was great eye opener.
Understanding the lyrics, is to read and understand the Bible - as I soon learned the entire opera was written word for word, though the phrases were mixed from various books and verses, from the Bible.
So that night, I sat on the floor with the booklet from the cd open, and followed along with my Bible in the other hand; paging to the verses and scriptures each lyric was taken from.
I felt, being the eve before my baptism, I really should be studying more about baptism, yet I really wanted to listen to the cd. So, I got my Bible out and went line by line followed through Handel's "Messiah."
And in the middle of it, I had a revelation. As I read the scriptures, I realized how amazing Handel really understood the Bible. I also learned, or rather it hit me, during looking at the lyrics – which was the Word of God in these repeated again and again by the opera singers - the huge sacrifice that Jesus went through for us.
As I listened and saw through what Handel’s writer had chosen of the few scriptures of the Bible, I began to cry.
I began to weep. Tears streamed down my face for I started to understand the pain, torment, horror, humiliation unimaginable brutality that God's Son had gone through for us.
So that night I realized how larger than life God's love for man is. His love for me.
Man, the very creature He created in His own likeness, that He loved so, but man has continually and largely ignored God and his wonders.
God loved man so much to save him that He sent his Son, Himself down in the flesh – to be as a Lamb – a sacrifice –to take away the sin of the world - to be beaten with sharp bone and glass laced leather straps, to be shamed, humiliated, punched, dragged, paraded through the streets to be publicly mocked, judged and brutally and grotesquely put to death, by man – the very same creature God created and loves.
I mean, think of what Christ the Son of God - the same as God – went through when He came down to earth in the flesh in order so man could learn His teachings and His Doctrine and Law.
Jesus said the greatest lesson a man can learn was that of - to love his neighbor.
God didn't put a limit to that love. He said "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thy self."
Think of how hard it is for you, to go down the street to your neighbor, and say "I love you neighbor" and really mean it? How hard it is for you to help a stranger, as you yourself would want to be helped? Yet God loves every one of His creations the same. Everyone He loves, yet man cannot find it in his heart to thank, let alone love God back. Love Jesus? No that's too hard.
So, now imagine what kind of love it is to God, to Jesus. That's a love source so much larger than HUGE in comparison to man.
So I came to that realization, then I prayed and thanked my God for revealing it to me.
I went to bed, so excited, yet not knowing what Sunday would bring.
St Patrick's Day
How ironic, or fitting, that God chose St Patrick's Day. I had no idea, what day it was when I first decided on Monday that I wanted to be baptized. For I had engulfed nearly one third of my life to Ireland and Irish Republican Politics.
Baptism Day
Sunday St Patrick's Day came. I was so happy and excited. We drove to the church. I had a bag with me of spare clothes and to change into, my Bible, and a gift my church friend, and the person who would be baptizing me.
So, we all met inside the church, shook hands and began praising the Lord.
We had a special treat that day, for a friend of the pastor, a preacher of the more evangelistic nature was visiting from another area, and he was to take over the sermon for the day.
Now about 30 minutes into the first part, my girlfriend’s friend who was from a local Baptist church, showed up as she wanted to be there for my baptism. So, we decided since so many that morning had filled in the pews, we should go to the upper balcony. So we all went up to the upper balcony to hear the sermon from up there.
It was a good sermon, but not at all like the kind we were used to. His style was more modern and very much like a TV evangelistic style. The evangelist at one point, asked all the new visitors to come to the front. He was now finished the main sermon, and began part of the church service where the preacher (we are used to as it happens every service) where the Preacher calls on the Holy Spirit of God to come down to help heal and hear prayers of those in need. So he began asking for any visitors with ailments, physical disease, or pain to come to the front and he was going to heal people with the power of the Holy Spirit as the Bible testifies.
(MARK 16:15-18)
Born in the Spirit
Now, all this took place at the front of the alter, so I could not see well, but only could hear. Yes, people were being given the Holy Spirit (where the Name of Jesus is called upon, and His Spirit, the “Comforter” comes down to those in need, calling to Him) and I could hear some who had now spoken in tongues, likely for their first time ever -as the Bible bears record to.
But the preacher then asked everyone in the church "How many here, would like to receive the Holy Ghost right now?"
Along with the many others, I raised my hand. But, I did not get out of my seat in the balcony to go down to the front of God’s alter.
The preacher began to call upon the Lord, shouting: “in the Name of Jesus”.
I closed my eyes, and out stretched my hands high above me, and I began to say, “Hallelujah Lord” repeatedly. But at that very moment I said to myself, “No, I believe.” and If it –The Holy Ghost– comes to me as God’s will, then I want it to come naturally and not confuse it with something I said repeatedly over and over again” –I wanted to know it.
So, I began to just praise aloud to God as high and holy as I could, in my mind I was telling Him with a great feeling of happiness and bold thanksgiving and praise, how much I loved Him for His sacrifice, His endless mercy and great love of man. Before I knew what was happening, I began to feel a funny feeling below.... Suddenly...
I WAS SINGING WITH MY TONGUE!
I was speaking in Tongues!
God was pouring His Spirit into me! I was praising in a tongue, a language that only God could understand!
IT WAS AMAZING!
MY church friend whom was sitting next to my left, later recalled that he wasn't paying much attention to me at the time, but then he turned around and saw me start move my arms and speak with my tongue loudly and he said to himself, " Oh! Wow! I better place my hands and pray with him."
Up to that point, no one had touched me, nor had I tried hard at all–only God and His Comforter, the Holy Spirit.
I just praised and though my eyes were closed, yet my sight was filled of a brightly shining light and my tongue was going up and down making strange utterances. It sounded funny, it sounded strange, yet felt amazing!
I was now talking directly to God the way the Bible had testified.
Remember, that THROUGH GOD, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!!
My speaking or singing to the Lord lasted about 1-2 minutes of me just praying out loud in tongues. During it I PRAYED AND I PRAISED, I THANKED! I praised my Lord so as much as I could. Expressing my sheer wonderment and my joy to Him.
Ready to be baptized
When I finally stopped speaking in tongues, I opened my eyes to see there was no light above me, but everyone was now standing around me, amazed and smiling. My friend then said to me “Are ya ready to be baptized? You've just been baptized, as Christ said, born of the Spirit. Now we’re going to wash those sins away, baptize you in Jesus’s Name, in the water, in the blood of Jesus.”
I answered, “YES! I'm ready!” I was so happy and excited. I never felt more delighted. I practically ran down the stairs.
On the way down, I saw the visiting preacher down below, so I ran up to him. I did not know the man, nor where he came from, but I had to let him know what just happened.
I hurriedly up to him as he was speaking with others, and waited, until he was finished, because I didn't want to interrupt. Then I said to him. "Excuse me, but I just received the Holy Ghost and I wasn't at the front, I was sitting up in the balcony, and I spoke in tongues... and today is the day I’m to be baptized here." He was so happy to hear that and thanked me and blessed me. I was just happy to tell somebody it.
I bid the preacher goodbye, then quickly walked through a doorway, up the steps behind the church alter, which leads to the baptism area. I hurried past the baptism tub and went into the preparation area. My friend told me to pick out a robe as I entered another room where I would change. I closed the door, changed my clothes and put on a light green robe.
I could hardly contain my joy. I laughed, I cried, I smiled. I was so happy. I was so excited. I praised God several times, and asked God to wash me of all my sins, before I finally opened up the door. I was shaking with joy and walked out to be met by my dear friend, whom was about to baptize me – wash me of my sins.
There, by my side
As I walked out, I was in a daze, smiling the whole time. He began to explain to me what was going to happen, as I stepped into the water...
I stepped into the water... It felt, not like water, but a viscous and a heavy-laden fluid. It was warm to the touch, and I was given a seat to that looked like a painted milk crate to sit on. My friend began to pray and explain to me what was going to happen. I was so in awe, I felt the water around me and then suddenly…
I FELT SOMETHING ELSE there in the water…It was not human, but was the Spirit.
IT’S TRUE!
HE WAS THERE BY MY SIDE IN THE WATER. I felt His same PEACE.
I had no fear, I was ready! I was told to hold my nose, grab my hand holding my nose– we were going back!
The next thing I remember, was going down in the water. And as I came out, I could tell I was coughing slight bit, but as I opened my mouth to begin to speak to praise God aloud, I began to speak in tongues yet again!
I spoke in the same tongues just like I had only half hour before. I spoke only a few seconds until it stopped and I could hear myself praising to God in English again.
I was so happy, I cried. I felt like I was clean– pure and “White as snow”. I felt refreshed, felt even dazed a bit. I was so happy. I was soaked head to toe (in Jesus’ Blood) as I stepped out of the water and I kissed my girlfriend and gave her a big hug. Then I posed for a picture with my friends.
I walked into the changing area, and there I met another whom had just been baptized, before me. He had been one of several visitors down at the alter who had received the Holy Spirit. Later I found out He had come out of a coma the week before and almost died. Not knowing any of this, I walked over to him and laid my hand on his shoulder and I said "Peace be with you. May God bless you my son."
I really didn't realize what I was saying at the time, but I felt different. I was so happy. I had just been touched in a way I never ever felt imaginable.
Now, I was born of the water (JOHN 3:5) and I was buried with Christ in baptism. (COL 2:12) My sins - the old man I was (ROMANS 6:6-6:14) - had been nailed upon Jesus's cross (COL 2:14) – with him.
I have been washed in His blood, the water symbolic of the blood of Jesus - shed for the repentance of our sins during His sacrifice - “Behold the Lamb of God with taketh away the sin of the world.” (JOHN 1:29) He washed my robe, made white in the blood of the lamb (Rev 7:14)
So, when I arose out the water (I was resurrected from the dead, like Christ) Death, the Bible teaches us, is sin. We die daily through the repentance of our sins – by asking God for forgiveness of our sins.
Once you have been baptized calling out the Name of JESUS which is: THE NAME of the Father, the Son and Holy Ghost. (MATTHEW 28:19) In my baptism, I quicken together with Him (Jesus and I now become as spirit, joined as one), having forgiven you all trespasses.
(Colossians 2:13)
I have learned much
The Bible speaks of tongues as a gift from God, but its also serves a purpose, for those without the gift. For those who see and hear, can then believe - especially when they see their own love or friend or yourself suddenly speak in weird sounds out of him or her as they never did before. The Bible states of the gift of tongues:
In the Law it is written, with men of other tongues and lips will I speak unto this people; yet for all that they will not hear me, saith the Lord.
(1 CORINTHIANS 14:21)
Wherefore tongues are for a sign, not to them that believe, but to them that believe not: but prophesy serveth not for them that believe not, but for them which believe.”
(1 CORINTHIANS 14:22)
It truly is God pouring through me, as He does through all others who speak in tongues. It is a gift from He and He alone.
I know not why now I was chosen to receive of such a gift, perhaps because I've believed so strongly. Perhaps, because, I gave Him my ears, my eyes, my tongue, my mind, and my heart. I held nothing from Him.
Jesus said, "ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full."
IT'S TRUE!
Jesus said: Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice: and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me. To him that over cometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne. (REV 3:20)
Each of us has to find God, but you need to open your heart in truth and your mind. If you open your mind for a moment - hopefully one day forever - to forget “the world” you know as it exists, and accept that there is something far more awesome and powerful. Life means so much more than what we see it as.
Since I've learned this, my days get easier. My work gets easier, my fear of evil and death is almost gone, my fear of God is not.
My walk with God grows day by day. Even though I’m reborn and renewed I still must continue to stay free from sin. I must wash myself daily in the Word of God. I follow God's laws now, and must ignore my own sinful nature as one of the flesh.
If I fall – fall back into the sinful world, then I will fall into the “Lake of Fire” whereby my soul, my true life will be ended. I shall die twice. “This is the second death” (REVELATION 20:14)
So, I will not be backslid. If need be, I will cut off those that do sin around me and I will stay free of the temptations, that which causes sin.
I will pray each day for His forgiveness and praise Him all the days of my life.
I daily praise to my Lord, my Savior, the one who redeems me and saved my soul. The one who loves me more than I have loved myself or anyone else could love me – my Lord Jesus Christ, the LORD of Lords, the KING of Kings, the Prince of PEACE.
The more I read the Bible, the more it makes perfect sense to me. I do not profess to know all that it contains, but I know that God is He who pours forth the knowledge. God opens to all of us, wider the narrow doorway to salvation. (MATTHEW 7:13,7:14)
I believe.
This world we live in today, is no different than the days of the Bible. Today we live just as those lived in Egypt or Babylon. Look around you, there is great abomination in our country. We are not a “nation” which follows “under God.” We may think we are "indivisible", but we are not. God is. Our world is full of great tribulation and sin. Man continues to deny the Lord His right.
Mankind was created for God – created solely for his pleasure in fellowship, but man continually looks to man - so he falls away from the Lord.
It is simple, if you read the Bible, understand the lessons, and truly look and ye shall find.
Every time I open up the Bible, I find something there I had not seen there before. It’s new and exciting, it continually reveals more all the time.
The Bible breaths of Life. It is our “Book of Life”, given to us by God Himself!
The most important thing here to realize is each of us has his or her own walk with God. No one can walk it for you.
The Lord gave his life in the flesh for YOU, to save YOU, so you need to do a bit more for Him. You need to come to Him in the truth and TRULY BELIEVE.
God IS REAL!
Jesus is THERE right NOW. He is listening to you and your tongue, your mind as you read this, your prayers. He sees all. He saves every one of your tears. He is there and everywhere at once, for He is of the Spirit. He is King of the all of that realm. No others come before Him or after Him. He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the Last.
(Rev 22:13)
This is my testimony, but YOU NOW NEED TO FIND YOUR OWN!
Any glory belongs to God, for He alone was responsible for all.
Believe it or not GOD IS VERY REAL
He is HERE NOW!
Our TEST is to OBEY and COME TO HIM.
For in Him is Everlasting Mercy, Everlasting Love, Everlasting Joy & Everlasting Life.
For those who do not hear Him, there nothing but Everlasting Death.
Read the Bible. Read it front to back one time; then read it back to front and front to back again
Study it till you can know it!
When you first open your Bible, open your heart.
Study it and you will find it will reveal to you things!
The Bible will be THE BOOK, the manual YOU WILL NEED TO LEARN in order to reach God. It is our BOOK OF LIFE. (REV 20:12) No other book on this earth can compare to it.
No other book.
Call out to JESUS. HE WILL COME.
You will feel a change in your life! Your soul!
Follow His doctrine: line upon line, precept upon precept, (ISAIAH 28:13) in the volume of the book, (PSALM 40:7) you will be back in His Holy arms as a lost sheep returned to the flock.
(JOHN 10:11)
If you live with those who live in the world - your cozy world you find comfort in with its sinful nature
(GAL 5:16-21)– then you need to separate yourself. For sin tempts sin and there will be no room in heaven for those who did not follow the Lord.
PRAY TO THE LORD THY GOD
We must daily confess our sins and repent not to a priest, to God.
We must praise and love thy God who made us as He made all there is.
For in Him is ever abundant love for you.
Jesus said, "Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the Kingdom of God.
That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.
Marvel not that I said unto thee, Ye must be born again.
The Wind bloweth where it listeneth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh or whither it goeth: so is every one that is born of the Spirit." (JOHN 3:5-3:8)
What I testify herein, is to the best my ability, true.
I believe God will help you. If you have sinned, He will forgive you. He will change you – mold you like a potter’s clay into something new.
In God’s Grace, you will do greater things that you can ever possibly imagine.
THE GLORY IS HIS FOR EVER AND EVER. Amen
Thank you for reading this.
I pray you will have received something new and useful to you.
REJOICE!
THY GOD LIVES!
Do you know God?
Do you know Jesus?
Are you still walking in sin?
Have you repented to God of your sin?
Have you been baptized into Christ?
Are you washed in the Blood of the Lamb?
What shall you do to be saved?
